Sunday, June 20, 2010

Drunk people are funny.

Location: The floor in front of the couch.
Listening to: A pump truck outside sucking up what I can only imagine to be the contents of a backed up sewer (ewww) and also Desperate Housewives
Days til College: 71


Well. Today was pretty much a success, let me tell you. There was an overall sense of "win" in the air. It was glorious and fantastic. And I feel like just leaving it at that, but I'm not the type of girl to leave you hanging like that.

So, obviously, it was Father's Day today. I love my dad. He's pretty much the greatest guy ever. He's really quiet most of the time and doesn't say much (ewww, definitely backed up sewer....ugghhh....everything smells like feces....this is gross...I need to close the windows....aaggghhh) but when he does it's usually hilarious. My dad is a firefighter with a love for practical jokes. Some of the favorites he's told me about are:

-Once, a new guy started on their firefighting squad thing. And they like to kind of haze newbies. So my dad rigged up some surgical tubing to a water bottle and stuck the bottle under the guy's mattress. Then he ran the tubing up under the guy's sheets. So every time the guy sat on or laid down in his bed, water pooled everywhere and it look like he peed himself. They did this for a week or two before the guy figured out what was going on.

-There was a guy on their squad who they called The Colonel. This guy was ancient and had been on their team since they had to use a bucket brigade to put out fires (well, that's what my dad said, at least). The fire fighters used to run a toy drive around Christmas where they would collect old broken toys and fix them then give them to needy children. One of the toys they had was a sword. This was also around the time that they first started coming out with universal remotes. One of the guys on the squad got a universal remote and another guy would point the toy sword at the TV and the guy with the universal remote would change the channel. The Colonel had the real remote in his hand and he didn't know about the universal remote, so he thought the guy was changing the channel with the sword. They had him totally convinced. And they let him think that until they gave the sword away.

Anyway, my dad rocks. And today was also his birthday. So we went to a celebratory father's day/birthday brunch at my grandma's and then to a community theater production of Rent which a ton of my friends were in. It was amazing. If you've never seen Rent, it's about a bunch of people living with HIV/AIDS and it's an incredible show. If you've only seen the movie, I highly recommend seeing the live show once. It's a true rock opera (nearly everything is sung) and completely amazing.

After the show I went to talk to the people I know and I got kidnapped and taken to the guys dressing room where I watched Bobby (who is a friend of mine who is four-ish years older than I am and has a habit of trying to hit on everyone. He's kind of large, and kind of like a teddy bear, so that doesn't really work.) and another guy I didn't really know chug a 32 oz bottle of Smirnoff Iced each. So watching them drunkenly try to help strike the set was kind of amusing. They kept hitting on me, which wasn't so good. But Steve was kind of babysitting them. So it was fine.

Exboyfriend #3 was also there. I made sure I looked really good out of spite. Which is petty, but entertaining. Anyway, he keeps hitting on Alison's sister so we car-painted his car. We didn't want to be mean, just awkward, so we wrote, "Happy anniversary schnookums! I love you and your hot bod!" and then a heart on his back window. He found out it was us and thought it was funny, and also thought it was ok to start texting me again. Whatever, though. I don't really care. It was just weird.

Now I'm fielding drunken texts from Bobby and trying to make sure Alex and Steve are keeping an eye on him because he is definitely not sober. They all went to a party after strike. It's kind of amusing. And kind of like, "Why do you think you need to be inebriated to have a good time?"

But I don't think Steve and Alex are drinking. At least, Steve said he's not. He called me when I was asking him something about Bobby.

But yeah. Interesting night. Tomorrow I work a closing shift for the first time ever. We'll see how that one goes.

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