Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Spilling The Beans

Location: Desk
Listening to: Practical Magic on ABC Family
Today's Odd Holiday(s): National Mincemeat Day

Ok. I've never actually had mincemeat (or, as pictured above, mincemeat pie) but can I just say...um...ewwww. That does not look appealing in any way, shape, or form. It just looks...gross. Ick.

Anyway, I have decided that today is the day I let you in on my boy news. Partly because I just love telling the stories, partly because I've come to value your input and I want to see what you guys think of this. Because, honestly, I'm not really sure what to think myself.

Monday, October 11 - the day before my birthday. A boy named Josh (who I can't recall if I've mentioned before, but who I'm going to pretend you know everything about) who I'd been hanging out with for a little over a week came over to my dorm to hang out. We were eating some soup my mom sent back with me and chatting, when I looked at the clock and realized I had to change for an intramural soccer game. I told Josh this and he just kind of stood around. I really had to get going, and I was about to start changing with him standing right there, when he turned to me and said, "This is going to be awkward with your roommate right there, but do you want to go out?"

I was caught entirely off guard. I mean, I'd guessed that he liked me. He texted me pretty frequently and just gave me that "I'm into you" sort of vibe. But I really hadn't given much thought to how I felt about him. After all, I'd only known him for a week. So I replied with a diplomatic, "Maybe" and promises of explaining further after my soccer game.

So, after the game, I texted him and told him that "maybe" was not a polite way of saying no, but I said it because I wasn't sure of a lot of things. I didn't know if he meant go out as in "become his girlfriend" or go out as in "go on a date". I also told him that I didn't think I knew him well enough to be his girlfriend, but I'd be open to going on a date.

Instead of taking it, he got all whiney and started giving me crap about how it was awkward for him because he "put it all out there" and he's the type who just wants to "jump right in" and yadda yadda yadda. Eventually, when I think it became kind of obvious that I was not happy with him and his stupidity, he said, "I would like to go on a date though. I just wanted to tell you today because I think you're really great, even if you don't think the same of me. This is just a shitty feeling. So yeah. Sleep well."

What the hell. What kind of person tries that hard to make you feel bad? Not someone I'd like to date. Anyway, he hasn't talked to me since then, and I haven't made a huge effort to start a conversation with him.

During this whole ordeal, I was keeping David (the boy I kind of had a crush on) filled in, since he was partly to blame after stealing my phone and heavily flirting with Josh while pretending to be me. He told me that Josh wasn't worth my time and any guy who got mad at a 'maybe' only wanted one thing. It was nice and kind of comforting.

October 12 - my birthday. I had history through film, which is the class David is also in. When he got to class, he sat down next to me and took my phone and used it to text himself, "Dear David, you're hot and I want to kiss you passionately. Love, Abbie."

You can imagine how the rest of the night went. He was insanely flirty, sending me all kinds of texts about how pretty I was and how he just really wanted to kiss me. One of the things I wanted to do on my birthday was cross something off of my bucket list. He happened to read my bucket list and spotted that there was a thing on there about "kissing someone just for the hell of it." And he decided that's what he was going to help me with.

So after class, David gave me a ride back to my dorm. We got to his car and he put on "Transatlanticism" by Death Cab For Cutie - his favorite band and one of mine, also. He pulled into the parking lot behind my dorm, got out of the car, and walked around to open my door. I had my backpack, and he slid it off my shoulder before placing it on the ground, pulling me close, and kissing me.

I swooned a little.

After that night, we talked a lot the first few days. Slowly, though, conversation started lagging. We never seem to have much to talk about. It confuses me because, at times, I'm really interested in him. I want to learn everything about him and be his best friend and know him. Other times, I feel like he just flirts with me because he's just interested in one thing and I worry that I'm not sure if he flirts like that with other girls or if he ever actually means any of the nice things he says. As a boyfriend, he looks great on paper, but I'm not sure how things would pan out in real life.

Anyway, we're not officially together. And there's more.

Yesterday - October 25. A new guy has stormed into the picture. Well, not stormed so much as "snuck his way in without me really noticing and now he's there". His name is Brad. He's a senior, so there's a bit of an age difference. He's also, ironically, in my History Through Film class (the same one that David is in). He lives in the apartments behind my dorm, and my friend Jess and I started talking to him on our way back from class one night. We made him add us on Facebook, and since then, he and I have been kind of talking.

We have pretty similar taste in music and books, so we have a lot to talk about. When we got on the topic of books, I mentioned how I didn't have anything new to read here, and he told me he'd let me borrow something of his. But it was Tuesday (or maybe Wednesday) night, so I had to remind him to bring it to class today. So for the rest of the week, I obnoxiously IMed him and messaged him and texted him about bringing me the book. And in between my harassment, we had really interesting and amusing conversations.

Yesterday, I was talking to him about music. He cohosts a radio show on the campus radio station and mentioned that his cohost wasn't going to be there that night, so he was probably just going to be playing a lot of music. I discovered this awesome song yesterday ("Hey" by Backseat Goodbye) and he told me he might play it on his show. I freaked out and got really excited. Then he said he might even give me a shout out. And I got more excited. Then he said, "Or you could just cohost."

And I almost peed my pants.

One of the things on my (extensive) bucket list is being on the radio. I've always thought it would be fun to DJ, because I love music and I have a lot to say. So Brad talked to his program manager and it was fine with them, so I got to guest cohost his show.

So he met me by my dorm and we walked over to the station and he taught me some of the ins and outs of radio. It was a great time. He was really flirty through the whole thing, too. In between segments, he would read things off of my bucket list and tell me that he was going to help me with them. Or we'd look up things to use as segments for after the current songs. Pretty much it was hilarious and fun. I felt really comfortable around him by the time we were done with the show.

Today I was talking to him to remind him to bring me the book, and he kept telling me that he left it in his car and wouldn't be able to stop to get it before class. I told him I didn't believe it, so we decided to make a bet on it. He chose the bet: loser had to make/buy the winner dinner.

Needless to say, I was totally right. He did have the book with him, so now he owes me dinner. And he's decided that he's going to help me cross off "Watch all 6 Star Wars movies in one sitting" and "Learn how to cook" from my bucket list. So it appears we will be spending a decent amount of time together.

The thing is, I don't know how I feel about him, either. I mean, I'm really comfortable around him. He's easy to talk to and we have a lot in common. He's pretty average looking and mildly awkward at times, but so is everyone else. He seems really sweet and nice, but I also don't know him well enough to know if I should believe everything he says.

Ohhh, the joys of being a naive teenage girl.

What are your thoughts? If you were in my situation, would you pick one boy over the other? It's really strange having them both in the same class, especially because today David stopped by my room to offer me a ride to class (the weather is nasty - windy and rainy and cold). And I usually walk back to my dorm with Brad.

How would you handle it? Would you let them know that there was another guy and you were trying to decide? Would you wait to say anything until one of them formally asked you out? Would you just hang out with them individually and try to pretend like everything was normal?

I'm kind of at a loss. I've never really been in this situation.

Anyway, those are my big stories. I hope they were worth the wait! 


  1. Team Brad.."He's pretty average looking and mildly awkward at times," says that he is comfortable to really be normal. That he is so into you to help with your bucket list says how interested he is. Be a kid, enjoy these things and be a friend first then a girlfriend.
    And wtg for balancing everything you got going on.


  2. I agree with cs. You seem to be handling all these guys perfectly by giving them a chance to screw up and not committing to anything. Enjoy these times and enjoy your friends. Make them work for your attention and affection and by all the effort they seem to be putting into knowing you, you must be (and totally are) worth it. You have your whole life to commit to one person. Now is the time to learn what you really want and I would hate for you to ever regret anything. Thanks for sharing these stories. I feel like I am back in college everytime I read them.